Asthma is an Ugly Word

My 5 year old has been flirting with an asthma diagnosis for over a year now. He has year round allergies (to dust mites - oh joy!) and is either sneezing or coughing or both at all times. It's been frustrating and unsettling, but I think the slap in the face came yesterday.

We went to a regular check-up at his allergist's office on Tuesday morning. All seemed well with my son, and the doctor informed me whatever situation cropped up, I was doing the right thing to maintain control of it. If the coughing starts and won't stop, put him on the nebulizer. Give him his daily meds to keep the sneezing/runny nose/itchy eyes under control. Okay, got it! Not a problem.

Then yesterday morning, I get a call from my insurance company informing me we were entitled to some information and services with respect to my son's asthma diagnosis. Excuse me?!?

So there it is. The "A" word has been unleashed. I suppose in comparison to some other diagnoses, this one isn't so bad. But it does give me pause. Why does my son have to suffer? What did I do wrong? Is it something I did or didn't do when he was a baby? Did I expose him to something harmful along the way that lead to this? What should I or could I have done differently?

He's an otherwise happy and healthy boy. He just needs to be watched a little more closely and maintained a little bit more. Me, on the other hand, well, mommy guilt is a terrible thing.